“Water Solutions” from the Georgia Trend magazine makes some interesting points, and highlights a water-recycling plan in Georgia that is setting an example internationally, but unfortunately, the article is so unorganized that I feel like its main point is lost in the jumble of ideas and clichéd phrases. (To view the article, follow the link, click on the 'Environment' tab on the left. "Water Solutions" is the second article.)
The graph starts with a dramatic tone, and I personally rolled my eyes at it. Had I not been interested in the topic, I might have not read the rest of the article based on the over-done tone of the very first sentence. It made the water problem in Georgia sound like the end of the world is near. I consider myself environmentally conscious, a border-line ‘tree-hugger,' but I’m also realistic, and sentences that compare our drought to ‘pitiless lava’ flowing over the state make me laugh.
Moving on.
My biggest complaint about the article is that the main point (Clayton County’s water treatment method) isn’t reached until the fourth graph…and then, the method isn’t described until the very end—graph 31. I had to read on and on through a slew of facts before finally reaching a description of the treatment method.
I feel that the writer, Jerry Grillo, used too many quotes, most of which are facts that could have been re-worded and stated as such. Almost every other graph starts with an unnecessary quote, which makes the article hard to follow.
Grillo was also very vague in much of the article. He mentions “cutting edge technology” and “future projects” without any further descriptions or even links to show what those might be. I think a helpful addition would be in-depth descriptions of water treatment and recycling methods in other parts of the country and the world.
Georgia, as a whole, is lagging behind many other states in water conservation and recycling, and by comparing Clayton county’s methods to others out there, I believe more readers may become interested and inspired. The U.S. EPA site has some helpful information and facts on water recyclling, its methods and benefits.
The article goes on to talk about an annual water ‘taste-testing’ award in Georgia. This is somewhat relevant, but I think that even more important would be a pH testing. Uninformed people may be skeptical of water-recycling, and need to be assured that the water is actually safe to drink, not just good-tasting.
Friday, January 23, 2009
Blog #1: Red and Black Article
While I was looking for articles to critique for this assignment, I came across an article in the Red and Black from January 22nd titled Physician leads effort to rid world of malaria. Upon seeing this headline, I immediately thought, "Well, that's great, but how does this at all relate to the university or Athens?" The first two paragraphs of the article consist of a short biography of Dr. Stephen L. Hoffman. Not until the third paragraph does the reader discover that Dr. Hoffman spoke at the University Chapel on January 20th.
Since the Red and Black is a newspaper "serving the University of Georgia community," it only seems proper that the headline should tie the physician's efforts to rid the world of malaria into his recent appearance at the university. As the headline appears in the paper, it could easily appear in the New York Times, Washington Post, or any other national newspaper. From the surface, it seems like a national news story inserted into the news section to fill up space at the last minute. Only when one delves further into the story (three paragraphs in!) does one realize that the story does indeed relate to the university.
Additionally, the first sentence of the article, "Dr. Stephen L. Hoffman is knocking on the door of a preeminent group of scientists," concerns me. The first question that comes to my mind upon reading this statement is, "what group?" The reporter, Alex Busko never answers this question directly. After reading the article, one could assert that Hoffman and perhaps other scientists are on the verge of curing malaria. However, Busko does not mention any other scientists that have been working on a cure for malaria, with or without Hoffman's help. Consequently, the "knocking on the door" metaphor is somewhat confusing considering the article lacks any other mention to the "group of scientists" Busko originally mentions.
Something that many newspapers have begun to do on their websites that I like is linking to related content. Unfortunately, the Red and Black has not followed suit. In this story, Busko could have linked to the website for Sanaria, Dr. Hoffman's company.
Since the Red and Black is a newspaper "serving the University of Georgia community," it only seems proper that the headline should tie the physician's efforts to rid the world of malaria into his recent appearance at the university. As the headline appears in the paper, it could easily appear in the New York Times, Washington Post, or any other national newspaper. From the surface, it seems like a national news story inserted into the news section to fill up space at the last minute. Only when one delves further into the story (three paragraphs in!) does one realize that the story does indeed relate to the university.
Additionally, the first sentence of the article, "Dr. Stephen L. Hoffman is knocking on the door of a preeminent group of scientists," concerns me. The first question that comes to my mind upon reading this statement is, "what group?" The reporter, Alex Busko never answers this question directly. After reading the article, one could assert that Hoffman and perhaps other scientists are on the verge of curing malaria. However, Busko does not mention any other scientists that have been working on a cure for malaria, with or without Hoffman's help. Consequently, the "knocking on the door" metaphor is somewhat confusing considering the article lacks any other mention to the "group of scientists" Busko originally mentions.
Something that many newspapers have begun to do on their websites that I like is linking to related content. Unfortunately, the Red and Black has not followed suit. In this story, Busko could have linked to the website for Sanaria, Dr. Hoffman's company.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Blog #1: Athens Banner Herald Online
The Athens Banner-Herald online article headline, Program uses arts to boost learning math, other subjects, is awkwardly constructed and does not convey the content of the article in the best manner possible. In the spirit of "improving everything around me," I think that the impact of this article would reach a broader audience if it was worded in a more creative, less stilted fashion. Nothing drew me to the article outside of the need to improve the headline for this blog.
While the headline needs improving, the article does redeem itself with a small degree of cleverness in the lead graph. Reporter, Merritt Melancon, said, “Learning basic arithmetic and phonics might not inspire many kids to sing or dance, but that doesn't mean that singing and dancing won't inspire them to learn.” This graph adequately grasps reader attention in the way that the headline did not. It also conveys the basic ideas that Melancon goes on to discuss throughout the article.
Unfortunately, there is another element working against Melancon for reader time. In my pursuit of the full body of this article, I encountered multiple annoyances in the form of “pop-up” advertisements. While Jason Winders, editor of the Athens Banner-Herald, said, in an interview, that corner-fold advertisements are so popular that he can consistently raise their rates, they are incredibly distracting to dismiss when I want to read an article on the Web site. Even more bothersome are full-page ads that you must exit before seeing any part of the article you are seeking.
While I understand that advertising revenue is absolutely crucial in generating revenue for the Banner-Herald, it would benefit the online editors to conceive of a means of displaying advertisements that does not completely block the actual product. The prevalence of annoying “pop-up” advertisements is one element that detracts from my enjoyment of the online news experience.
While the headline needs improving, the article does redeem itself with a small degree of cleverness in the lead graph. Reporter, Merritt Melancon, said, “Learning basic arithmetic and phonics might not inspire many kids to sing or dance, but that doesn't mean that singing and dancing won't inspire them to learn.” This graph adequately grasps reader attention in the way that the headline did not. It also conveys the basic ideas that Melancon goes on to discuss throughout the article.
Unfortunately, there is another element working against Melancon for reader time. In my pursuit of the full body of this article, I encountered multiple annoyances in the form of “pop-up” advertisements. While Jason Winders, editor of the Athens Banner-Herald, said, in an interview, that corner-fold advertisements are so popular that he can consistently raise their rates, they are incredibly distracting to dismiss when I want to read an article on the Web site. Even more bothersome are full-page ads that you must exit before seeing any part of the article you are seeking.
While I understand that advertising revenue is absolutely crucial in generating revenue for the Banner-Herald, it would benefit the online editors to conceive of a means of displaying advertisements that does not completely block the actual product. The prevalence of annoying “pop-up” advertisements is one element that detracts from my enjoyment of the online news experience.
Online News Design
As I was searching news Web sites to find articles for this assignment, I couldn't help but notice how much a Web site's design affected my willingness to browse its stories.
Take for instance the Red & Black. At first glance, nothing on the page really jumps out at me–well, other than the annoying banner advertisements. As Professor Parks has said, editors are called to improve everything around them. Everything. This includes design as well as grammar, punctuation and spelling.
In "The Newspaper Designer's Handbook," Tim Harrower explains, "the World Wide Web is still in its infancy. Only a decade ago, most editors and publishers had no idea how to translate news pages onto a digital platform."
I believe that it is now our job as editors reared in the technology era to visually improve how the news is translated from print to the Web.
Harrower continues, "like fish learning to walk on land, newspapers are slowly evolving and adjusting to this new terrain. Too many news Web sites are still disorganized, unappealing and unprofitable, but online design is steadily improving."
As journalists of the next generation, we must raise the standards of design even higher.
After noticing the disorganization and unappealing layout of the Red and Black's Web page, I looked at other news Web sites to see how these problems could be improved.
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution's Web site appears much cleaner and is much easier to navigate. Like the Red and Black, editors at the AJC have chosen not to take advantage of modern storytelling devices such as audio, video and animated graphics; however, in my opinion, the Web site is much more visually inviting despite its lack of multimedia usage.
Harrower emphasizes that special projects and the use of multimedia are truly the cutting edge of journalism. Now more than ever, I believe it is important for editors to use all of our technological resources in order to give citizens the most attractive, well-organized information possible.
Blog # 1 Life as a Townie
In the article Enjoy life as a townie after graduation, I find the commentary about life as a working adult in the "real world" to be false and over glamorized. The writer Phillip Kisubika explains how he once looked at "townies"--people who reside in Athens who are not students. He claims he once thought townies were weird. Although he once demised the life of a townie, he is now proud to call himself a one. For he believes that the benefits of being a townie, which include free drinks downtown to be far more self-fulfilling, then actually moving on from Athens.
Since Phillips worries no longer include updating his facebook status about "the last first day school", but rather missing article deadlines, he has much more incentive and need to "drink away a hard days work". And what better place to do that than downtown Athens? I feel that this article misrepresents the lifestyle of someone who just graduated. With the economy at it's current state not to mention the unemployment rate, recent graduates are strenuously looking for employment opportunities and are often coming up short. I do not believe that when I graduate in two semesters that I will be concerned with analyzing at current students facebook status' or getting a free beer downtown. In fact I predict it to be quite the opposite.
His depiction of the "transition period" between college and the "real world" is unrealistic. Moreover, if Phillip has a full time job, when does his "real world" actually begin? It seems more like Phillip has a hard time moving past the glory days of skipping class, football games and happy hours.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Blog #1: Banner-Herald Inauguration Story
Regarding news judgment, I think the Athens Banner-Herald's story, "Athens feels impact of momentous day," represents precisely the news angle needed by the Banner-Herald to produce hyper-local content without sacrificing essential state and national stories.
The article, written by a Banner-Herald staffer rather than an Associated Press reporter, approaches the story of Obama’s transition in to office by talking with Athens residents watching from home, locals that traveled to Washington, D.C., University of Georgia professors and local public officials. Though the task is admittedly easier with a story as big as the presidential inauguration, this is the kind of localization the Banner-Herald should incorporate in all its state and national coverage.
Even when mentioning the mood in Washington, the quote is from the manager of R.E.M., a hometown band. It’s right there in the headline: impact. Well done.
Stylistically, the lead is personal and opens the article up to many different reactions to the event. A huge number of quotes are included—and appropriately so in a reactionary piece—drawn from prominent local politicians as well as everyday Athens residents.
I was surprised that there was no mention of any negative reactions by Athens republicans or residents opposed to the new President. The word “momentous” in the headline does have positive connotations, but I think the story would have been more complete with the inclusion of an opposing viewpoint. I know there were several different articles about the inauguration in today’s newspaper. Perhaps negative feedback was reported elsewhere, and the editors decided this piece could be upbeat.
I questioned the construction of one sentence:
“Democratic Party of Georgia Chairwoman Jane Kidd, an Athens resident and another ticket-holder, was able to get to her seat relatively near the Capitol, but still was far enough away that she relied on a nearby Jumbotron, she said.”
Does there really need to be a comma within the section I have bolded? These are certainly not two independent clauses because the section after the comma could not stand alone as a sentence. Following the rule of thumb outlined in The Associated Press Stylebook, the comma before the conjunction is used if the subject of each clause is expressly stated; however, The AP Stylebook favors the use of a comma. My judgment favors no comma in this case, but I would appreciate a thoughtful comment to set the record straight. (Don’t miss this opportunity for one of your three required comments!)
We talked in lecture about the necessity for “moment” stories in forging an emotional bond between the newspaper and its readers, which I think this article exemplifies. This may not be precisely what Professor Parks meant, but the Banner-Herald Web site also has a link to an interesting, interactive Associated Press photo gallery of images from around the world as President Obama was sworn in to office.
The article, written by a Banner-Herald staffer rather than an Associated Press reporter, approaches the story of Obama’s transition in to office by talking with Athens residents watching from home, locals that traveled to Washington, D.C., University of Georgia professors and local public officials. Though the task is admittedly easier with a story as big as the presidential inauguration, this is the kind of localization the Banner-Herald should incorporate in all its state and national coverage.
Even when mentioning the mood in Washington, the quote is from the manager of R.E.M., a hometown band. It’s right there in the headline: impact. Well done.
Stylistically, the lead is personal and opens the article up to many different reactions to the event. A huge number of quotes are included—and appropriately so in a reactionary piece—drawn from prominent local politicians as well as everyday Athens residents.
I was surprised that there was no mention of any negative reactions by Athens republicans or residents opposed to the new President. The word “momentous” in the headline does have positive connotations, but I think the story would have been more complete with the inclusion of an opposing viewpoint. I know there were several different articles about the inauguration in today’s newspaper. Perhaps negative feedback was reported elsewhere, and the editors decided this piece could be upbeat.
I questioned the construction of one sentence:
“Democratic Party of Georgia Chairwoman Jane Kidd, an Athens resident and another ticket-holder, was able to get to her seat relatively near the Capitol, but still was far enough away that she relied on a nearby Jumbotron, she said.”
Does there really need to be a comma within the section I have bolded? These are certainly not two independent clauses because the section after the comma could not stand alone as a sentence. Following the rule of thumb outlined in The Associated Press Stylebook, the comma before the conjunction is used if the subject of each clause is expressly stated; however, The AP Stylebook favors the use of a comma. My judgment favors no comma in this case, but I would appreciate a thoughtful comment to set the record straight. (Don’t miss this opportunity for one of your three required comments!)
We talked in lecture about the necessity for “moment” stories in forging an emotional bond between the newspaper and its readers, which I think this article exemplifies. This may not be precisely what Professor Parks meant, but the Banner-Herald Web site also has a link to an interesting, interactive Associated Press photo gallery of images from around the world as President Obama was sworn in to office.
Sandwich Bandit?
I think that the article entitled, "Police on lookout for sandwich bandit," is misleading, but they caught it.
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