In an article from the Atlanta Journal Constitution, Guido Salvador Carabajo-Jara, a 26-year-old man from Ecuador, was struck by a car and then somehow rolled underneath a second vehicle, being dragged through New York City for almost 20 miles.
This is really a bizarre, tragic story. I was disappointed that such a story was barely covered, with only a few short graphs and no details at all on this man.
I don't really like the headline of the story either: 'Body dragged on NYC roads was 26, from Ecuador.' This headline is too wordy and I don't know why the author felt it was necessary to include ",from Ecuador" in the headline. How is that SO relevant to the story? And it's a bit of information, which the reader would have discovered by the third sentence anyway.
Also, shouldn't it say "man dragged on NYC roads" instead of body dragged?
Another minor thing which I found strange was in the second graph when it actually gave the phonetic spelling of the man's name. I may be wrong but is this a normal practice in news writing? I can't think of a time I've seen that before. Here is an article which involves people with hard-to-pronounce last names in which they give no phonetic spelling for. Better yet, here is another article with crazy last names which the author doesn't spell phonetically, names like Saltalamacchia.
An interview with one (or both) of the drivers would have been interesting and beneficial in explaining how exactly they managed to drag this poor guy all across town without even realizing. Both drivers were identified so it wasn't impossible to get a comment. Also, police said the "gruesome episode" was accidental, but they couldn't have known this without talking to witnesses or the drivers themselves.
Lastly, it would have been nice to include some insight on this man's life, seeing how he is dead now. Why did he move to the U.S.? What was he doing living in Queens? Did he have family?
Again, sad story-should have been given more in-depth coverage.
Note: I went back and researched this story again, the New York Times covered it very well in an updated article. The article not only interviews the driver, but also the victim's family. The NYT went in-depth covering Mr. Carabajo's background. From a small town in Ecuador, he was living with relatives in New York to work and save money. He had a 5-month-old child, and a huge, close-knit family. Making this story even more tragic, he was killed the day of his 26th birthday party. Even more shocking than that, his sister was at a coffee shop at the scene of the accident and witnessed the police activity; she had no idea the man who had been struck and dragged was her brother.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
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Max,
ReplyDeleteGreat work. You obviously weren't alone in your critique. Since you posted this, the original story has been edited. Take a look--the headline and pronunciation guide were edited and removed, respectively.